Moving with Babies
by xmenfan33
Summary: In the wake of the Salesmen invasion, Logan decides to pack up the X-men and move... or maybe not, who knows with this group?. Book ten of the Babysitting series
1. Jumping Ship

Moving with Babies

**Chapter One**

" Jumping Ship"

In the twenty-four hours following the Salesmen invasion, the dynamics of the household changed dramatically. Xavier seemed, at least for now, to have been restored as Headmaster. Logan had remained in this position as well, leading several to wonder how that would work, long term. For now, however, they were working well together as they organized the move.

Kitty's automated program had sent an e-mail, informing all of the parents of the move. This however, led to some negative reactions that Logan had not expected. In fact, by the end of that first twenty-four hour period, about half the student body's parents had written back, stating that they would be withdrawing their children. For some reason, these same 'brainwashed' parents, who were fine with rule changes, were far less alright with their child or children being moved to an undisclosed location. Logan continued to refuse to release the new address, even when these messages arrived.

Teachers as well, began jumping ship, after the initial overreaction had worn off. Several of them realized that they were unwilling to pack up their lives, and in most cases children, and move to the middle of nowhere. This again, was made worse by Logan's refusal to release the information.

By the end of the day, Angelo Espinoza, Illyana Rasputin, Josh Foley, Hope Abbott, Julian Keller, Ruth Aldine, Victor Borkowski, Laura Kinney, Gabriel Cohuelo, James Madrox, and Rahne Sinclair were the remaining student body. However, by the next morning, Hope, Ruth, and Gabriel had also been withdrawn from the school.

Additionally, Bobby, Jubilee, Ray, Amara, Sam, Tabitha, Elizabeth, Warren and surprisingly Jean ( who had somehow decided to give Scott another chance) had resigned their positions. Logan however, took this in stride, that was until Ororo and Henry resigned as well. Logan nearly lost it then. Ororo had been teaching at Xavier's nearly as long as he had.

" How could you abandon us in our hour of need like this?" Logan demanded.

" Logan. I'm tired. I'm tired of the drills, and the lectures. I'm tired of the children's constant fear of this 'Baby Apocalypse' . And I'm not moving to the valley with you. I'm just finished." Ororo replied, tiredly.

" Fine. Stay behind to see how well you can handle this new world without the support of the team! Just know that if you remain behind, we will not be excepting you back!" Logan growled.

Nodding , Ororo walked away to pack, and Logan then stormed to his office, completely missing the wide-eyed looks he had gained for his outburst. Piotr had considered, until this point, refusing to go as well, however, he hated confrontation, therefore changed his mind.

Wade and Emma, along with Megan would be coming ,of course, though Emma too was reluctant after the initial fear of the salesmen wore off. Wade was always game for whatever Logan came up with this time.

Wanda and John discussed it at length, and neither one of them was bothered by the move. Logan, however, would have been shocked to learn how close he had come to losing Remy and Rogue. He would have lost them, in fact, if not for Jamie.

Jamie overheard them talking about staying behind, perhaps moving west or possibly further south. He had begged them to stay, because despite the fact that Rogue used to scare him up a tree, frequently, he thought of her almost as a big sister. When Jamie, tearfully, asked Rogue not to leave him, she immediately agreed.

So, by the end of the first forty-eight hours, they had seven students, ten adults, and five babies moving to Snow Valley, including Charles and Logan. For some reason, this too pleased Logan. Mostly because he'd decided that they had too many people with them who didn't see the importance of either the Book or the Charts.

Before anyone else could change their minds about going, however, he decided they needed to clean and pack. Once again taking over control, Logan assigned jobs to the remaining residents.

" Okay. Everyone who claims residency ,still, we already cleared out the rifraf and deadweight, here IS what we're gonna do. Everyone, when I call your name, teachers too, I'll pull a card with a chore on it. That IS the job you will do, no trading, no complaints, no exceptions... The pregnant 'uns can redraw if they pull a card that may be hazardous to the baby, but NO EXCEPTIONS. We will then do it again for the packin'."

Everyone was too afraid to point out that he just listed an exception. Even Julian , miraculously, stayed silent. Though that may have been largely because the boy was preoccupied at scrolling through his playlist, and wasn't really paying attention.

The trouble started, surprisingly enough, with Charles, who wheeled up to him, as soon as Logan released the meeting. Logan had 'somehow' managed to draw 'Logan's Office' when he drew the first card, attempting to prove to everyone that it was fair. He now made his way to his office to 'clean' it when Charles rolled up.

" Logan. I know you said no exceptions... I cannot perform my assigned chore however."

" Why not? Everyone should be well suited to perform any job on the list, I see no reason for you to complain. Perhaps if you had ever bothered to assign these jobs when you were in charge-"

" Logan, you assigned me the BANISTERS ! It says to 'polish _every_ banister in the house, all three floors and the emergency landing of the basement levels'. I CAN'T do the banisters!"

"... Fine, if you can't take the challenge, Julian! Trade with Charles." Logan replied, pointing at the boy.

" Okay." Julian replied, handing over his card.

Logan nods and headed to his office as Charles yelled " OH FOR THE LOVE OF- _**POLISH THE GRAND HALLWAY?! **_"

Logan then walked into his office, and began packing. It wouldn't take him long, and then he could move on to supervising everyone else. He still didn't trust that a stray salesman may break in somehow. No one questioned the logic of cleaning the mansion, when they were abandoning it, at least not out loud to Logan. Plenty of them thought it however, as they moved to their assigned chores and packing. Julian, being Julian, decided to interfere as much as possible.

After all, how much worse could it get? In hindsight, he realized that planting the test on his girlfriend had been a mistake, however, she wouldn't talk to him long enough to apologize. Jamie was probably mad at him still too. The teachers, he was sure, were still livid. So he could do whatever he wanted. After all, what were they going to do, expel him? Well, probably, but Julian found he didn't care.

In fact, maybe he would _**try**_ to get expelled. Perhaps. He hadn't decided yet. Seriously, aside from Laura, who really had the right to be this mad at him anyway? He hadn't done anything THAT terrible. Plus he felt this whole 'moving' thing was an overreaction.


	2. Cleaning, interrupted

Disclaimer: I do not own X-men Evolution, or any Marvel characters

**Chapter Two**

" Cleaning, interrupted"

Josh had been placed in charge of cleaning, and packing the entire kitchen, including the good silver. _WHY does he want the silver polished anyway? It's not like we EVER use it!_ Josh thinks as he pulls the silverware boxes from the pantry, all eight of them. When he had first retrieved the key from Logan, as they were kept locked away, he was shocked that they even had silver, let alone EIGHT FRICKIN BOXES of silverware. Made of solid silver.

The boxes were heavy, yet he was still surprised when he opened the first box a moment later, to find a formal service for twenty. " YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!" Josh yelled, this was going to take all day!.

Grumbling, Josh began pulling out the silverware, stacking it in neat piles forks, spoons, and knives all divided by type. Then he repeated the process with the other seven boxes. At one point, during the seventh box, Julian and Rahne walked in and watched him for a moment.

A moment later Rhane questioned " How're you gonna know where to put them back?"

Josh stared blankly at the large piles of silver in front of him, all with identical handles. How was he gonna figure out where it all went? A few minutes of staring blankly later, Josh turned to his class mates and countered with. " Don't you have chores to do?"

" Yup" Julian replied, sitting down across from the boy, " But I have the banisters, that'll take like ten minutes, max, so Imma eatin first."

The Rahne nodded, and walk out with a bowl full of ice cream and Julian just smiled as Josh polished spoon after spoon. A few minutes later, Julian slowly reached out and picked a spoon out of the tiny 'done' pile.

" Hey this looks great. I can totally see my reflection in it!" Julian stated.

Josh mumbled a thanks as Julian picked up a second, then third spoon, and began balancing them on his fingertips. " Hey don't drop them, I'd have to start over." Josh stated.

" Oh sorry, here watch this trick instead." Julian replied, before picking up the entire ' done' pile, and attempted to stick all twenty spoons in his mouth at once, before dividing the pile in half and successfully placing them in his mouth side by side, to Josh's growing horror.

" YOU ARE THE BIGGEST IDIOT I HAVE EVER MET! HOW DARE YOU PUT THE **CLEAN**, RECENTLY **POLISHED** SPOONS IN YOUR MOUTH?! NOW I HAVE TO START OVER! YOU AREN'T GOING TO HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THE STILL WET POLISH MAKING YOU SICK BECAUSE I'M GOING TO **KILL YOU!" **Josh screamed as he stood knocking the remaining silverware off the table as he dived at Julian. Julian laughed as Josh attempted to strangle him, knocking over the bottle over polish and the table in the process.

Logan, hearing the loud crashing and hysterical screaming walked into the kitchen, just as Julian escaped out of a nearby window. Josh hanging half out of it.

" Really Josh, I know that polishing isn't the funnest task, but throwing the silver on the floor and attempting to jump out of a ground floor window is a bit extreme." Logan stated, pulling the boy back.

" I. but. I ..I DIDN'T DO IT JULIAN DID!" Josh sputtered out.

Logan shook his head and walked back out of the room, as Josh sighed deeply before gathering all of the silverware and dumping it into the sink. Now he had to wash and dry it all twice. Once before the polishing, and once after. Secretly, he hoped the polish DID make Julian sick. It would serve him right.

~o~O~o~

Illyana walked dejectedly towards the girls shower room. She hated being in the sub-levels. She hated the shower room. AND she hated cleaning. This was totally unfair, she got the worst job in the house!

Sighing, the girl set down the supplies and looked around the room. Perhaps she could just spray the cleaning gunk around and then hide out in her room all morning? It wasn't as if the showers were dirty. They had been cleaned just yesterday when the girls did the basement rotation. She knew because it had been her job... and she had just sprayed the cleaning stuff around and hid in her room the rest of the evening, just as she had done for the last four weeks... _touché, Logan, touché._

Illyana then resign pulled out the scrub brushes and began cleaning the furthest stall. This was going to take all day. The soap scum build up was sad. And she was pretty sure that there may be something alive down here, because she heard a strange scratching noise in the next stall.

Pausing in her work, she listened for a moment, but didn't hear anything, so she began again. But a moment later, again came the scratching noise. Slowly she stood, fully ready to run, if necessary, and listened again, yet she heard nothing.

After waiting a few minutes she began again, deciding to start at the top and work her way down, not really paying attention to the large pile of bubbles accumulating at her feet. And she heard the noise for a third time.

Illyana bolted for the door, hindered by the sudden movement, and the slick flooring she slipped a step later and slid , on her butt all the way to the wall. Where she landed with a loud bang.

She laid there on the floor fully expecting a serial killer to come out of one of the stalls and finish her off when she heard dripping... both from the stall she had been cleaning, and somewhere else. This is when she realized the sound she had heard was the echo of her scrub brush.

Twenty minutes later

Illyana grumbled as she scrubbed the last stall, now nearly done with the shower room, when the curtain yanked opened with a " Mahahaha"

Whirling around Illyanna punched out. Unluckily, she was kneeling at that moment, and therefore Julian now lay curled in a ball, cupping himself and moaning.

Illyana, after calming down, and realizing it was a joke, took a deep breath before yelling. "JULIAN! YOU IDIOT! YOU ARE NOT EVEN ALOUD IN HERE! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?! "

" Uggggggg, I think you permanently broke me." Julian moaned.

" Good! Then I did the world a favor and they won't suffer from a generation of YOU."

With that she stomped out of the room while she announced " I'm telling Logan you were in here!"

Julian quickly limped after her, begging her not to go to Logan, before she whirled around, punching him a second in the nose.

" Owe, I Tink yew boke my noss" Julian stated, holding his hand to his nose.

" I what?" Illyana replied, stopping again.

" MY. NOSSS. I . TINK. YEW. BOKE IZ." Julian replied again.

" Ohhhh, your **nose**. "

" yez"

"... Good! Maybe you'll remember that when you decide to scare me next time!"

Illyana then climbs into the elevator, and the door closes before Julian can join her.

"...siz" Julian grumbled, before looking for a place to hide.

~o~O~o~

Jamie was looking for someone to help him. Petra had been agitated by everything that had happened this week, he was convinced of that, despite lack of proof. He's asked Victor and Angelo, but they'd ignored him. Rahne was just as afraid of Petra as he was. Laura was cranky. Crankier than usual.

He was worried that asking the grown-ups would be useless, they after all, didn't believe him when he had told them Petra was alive. Josh was doing something in the kitchen, which sounded almost like the Salesmen invasion, so Jamie didn't want to bug him, and Illyana had just stormed by, angry looking. So, really that left Julian, so Jamie went in search of him.

Julian was hiding in the utility closet in the basement, attempting to get his nose to stop bleeding, when Jamie found him.

" What happened to you?" Jamie asked.

" Illyana punched me for scaring her." Julian replied.

" Oh okay." Jamie stated.

Julian looked around worriedly, before he asked if Jamie had seen Logan anywhere. Jamie shrugged .

" Hey, since you aren't busy, do you think you could help me with Petra." Jamie asked.

" Petra?"

" Yes Petra, the demon pizza under my bed. It's alive." Jamie reminded Julian, because the other boy seemed distracted today.

Julian nodded and they head to the elevator, to go to Jamie's room, it would probably be the best place to hide anyway.

" Jamie, I've been meaning to ask. Why Petra?"

" Petra. As is Petrified, you know permanently preserved."

" Or Petrified as in frozen with fear."

" Exactly! Now we ju-" Jamie began.

" Quick hide me!" Julian stated, diving behind the much smaller boy, then crawling behind a curtain.

Remy and Piotr were walking up the hallway, in search of Julian. Illyana had decided to complain to them instead of Logan.

" Have you seen Julian?" Remy asked, as they passed Jamie.

" No, what'd he do?" Jamie replied.

" He attacked my sister!" Piotr stated, fuming.

" She seemed fine to me, I think she may have overreacted. But we need Julian's side of the story." Remy added, to Piotr's glare.

The men walked away, still looking for the boy. Piotr seriously considering leaving his post after all. Jamie waited until the men were out of sight, before turning to Julian and demanding " What did you do?!".

" I thought it would be funny to spook her, so I did an evil laugh while she was scrubbing the showers."

" You did an evil laugh?"

" Yes."

" In the girls' shower?"

" Yes."

" Nothing else?"

" Yes. Well no I also chased her to try to get her not to tell."

" What's wrong with you."

" I dunno."

" Okay. Well. Let's go deal with Petra."

" Okay."


	3. Evading Capture

Disclaimer: I don't own X-men Evolution

**Chapter Three**

" Evading Capture."

Remy was still not convinced that Julian had 'attacked' Illyana in the girls' shower. He was sure the boy had gone in there, most likely to scare the girl, and probably succeeded. Because _**everyone**_ knew Illyana was scared of the shower room anyway. It was why Remy and Rogue had tried to talk Logan into reassigning her after the meeting. He refused, of course, so now Remy had this crisis to deal with. Plus he had to deal with Piotr's overreaction. Sighing out loud at this line of thought, Remy sat on the foyer bench. Was it possible to be too old for this crap at twenty? Because he was pretty sure he was.

This Julian thing though… he was sure Piotr was using it as an excuse. Julian was a lot of things, idiot seemed to be on the top of that list, but bully wasn't even on it. Yes, the boy tended to be a brat, especially in class, but there had never even been a rumor that he'd beaten up another kid before. So, why would he start now, with a girl that he barely even noticed was alive? No, it was far more likely that he had pranked the girl, and she had freaked out. Judging, as he's said, by her lack of visible damage, he would guess that Julian never hit her, however, judging by the blood drops he'd noticed downstairs, she'd probably already hit him.

Of course, when he'd tried to explain all of this to Piotr, it had been useless. Piotr was _**very**_ protective of his little sister, but he also tended to ignore her ability to dramatize everything. Remy had thought about it a while ago, and decided that Julian really reminded him of himself at that age, around the time he'd taken his future wife on 'vacation', so he understood the boy's way of thinking better than the others did,

No matter, because the boy needed to be found, Pete needed to be calmed down (if possible) and his family needed to be packed up. Really, some days he felt like life with the Guild had been easier, though he would never trade his family for anything.

~o~O~o~

Julian stared suspiciously under Jamie's bed. When he had come in here, he had fully intended just to sit and wait out the search. But then he'd heard a noise under the bed. Now he was wondering if there were rats under there or something. Jamie stood behind him, refusing to go any closer, because Petra was angry. Petra angry couldn't be good.

Just as both boys had begun to relax, and Julian had begun to stand back up, something grabbed his ankle, and drug him half under the bed. Julian screamed loudly, forgetting all about trying to hide. Jamie, seeing what happened, ran for help.

Jamie rushed down the hall, screaming for help, and gaining the attention of nearly everyone in the house. Logan, grumpily stopped the boy, and demanded to know what was wrong. He did _**not**_ have time for this. He had a self-imposed schedule to maintain!

Hysterically, Jamie rushed out. " Julian was helping me catch Petra, so that we could throw her away so that the new owners, whoever they are aren't eaten by her, when Petra grabbed Julian!"

" *sigh*, Jamie. No one else is moving in here, we still own it. Petra isn't real, Julian must be pranking you again." Logan stated, as he walked in the direction of Jamie's room, where Julian's screams could be heard.

They stepped into Jamie's room, a couple of the other students and several teachers behind them. Julian was still half under the bed, attempting to escape Petra. Logan, of course, thought that Julian was messing around and demanded that he knock it off.

Julian simply screamed for help once more. So Logan walk over to the bed and began pulling Julian loose. A moment later Julian was free. He jumped to his feet, and hugged Logan and thanking Logan for saving him. Logan patted him awkwardly for a moment, however, he still believed Julian had been pulling another prank. That was until Logan felt something grab his ankle.

Both boys screamed as they ran from the room, past the others waiting in the hall, and right into Angelo and Victor. Victor was laughing at something, while Angelo was standing next to one of the vents. The grate was off, and Angelo had sent a tendril of skin through it. It took the boys a moment , in their agitated state, to figure out what had happened. Angelo, meanwhile had grown very pale, while Victor backed carefully away.

" Hey!" Jamie stated a moment later. " Wait a minute! You're Petra? But why?"

" Because. It's funny." Victor stated as he prepared to run.

"What's going on over here?" Rogue demanded as she came up the stairs with Wanda.

Angelo immediately pulled the rest of the tendril out of the vent and the two pranksters ran, followed closely by John who had just figured out what had happened, and Wade, who loved to chase. Logan burst from the room a moment later, wild-eyed .

" Someone call the exterminator! There's something in that room!" Logan yelled.

" Logan…. You were pranked, so was Julian and Jamie." Emma stated.

" WHO?!" Logan demanded.

" Victor and Angelo."

~o~O~o~

Victor and Angelo had hidden safely in the last place anyone would think to look for them. Under Laura's bed. They tried to remain as quiet as possible and were hoping the girl in question would not return until the adults calmed down. She had not been in a good mood this morning, they assumed that she must hate moving or something.

As if to spite them, Laura and Illyana walked into the room a moment later, Rahne close behind them, as Laura began tossing her clothes into a duffel bag.

" So, are you going to let him apologize?" Rahne asked after a moment.

" I wouldn't" Illyana added. " He's a jerk, he attacked me earlier."

"Yana, you told me the whole story and he did _**not**_ attack you. Any more than the mailman did that time… or the dryer." Laura stated.

" Hmph. You're just on his side cause he's your boyfriend." Illyana declared, frowning.

" You tend to exaggerate everything! Everyone knows that but your brother." Rahne stated as she sat on Laura's bed.

" Well you weren't there!" Illyana exclaimed.

" Okay. So tell us this then, was it before or after the 'serial killer' in the next stall attacked you, again?" Laura asked in a sarcastic tone. Illyana frowned and flopped onto the bed that used to belong to Paige. " and to answer the question, I'll let him apologize when we finish moving. By then he actually mean it." Laura continued.

" You mean he wouldn't now?" Rahne stated.

" He won't later either." Illyana added.

"He is now, but I'm still mad. Stop it Yana, or you can just leave." Laura stated.

" He's a jerk. " Illyana stated, crossing her arms.

" You're a drama queen." Rahne countered.

Before Illyana could respond with her standard 'am not, you are,' the girls heard a cough under the bed. This made all three of them scream, which in turn caused Remy and Logan to burst into the room, claws and cards waving.

Terrified at the idea of being blown up or stabbed, the boys climbed out from under the bed, and ran past the men , through the door, and down the hall, all the while screaming themselves.

~o~O~o~

Amid the chaos of the morning, the only ones who managed to actually pack were Rogue, Wanda, and Josh. Josh found the job a lot easier, when it occurred to him that he didn't _**have**_ to polish all of the silver. He could polish a couple from each box, and then Logan would smell it and think Josh had done them all. Then it occurred to him, that he didn't have to _**really**_ polish any of them. He could just lightly place polish on a few, and Logan would never know. After all, they never used the silver anyway.

Now that he was done, he went to pack his own room. Having completely missed the whole thing upstairs thanks to his mp3 player, Josh was shocked to find the pranksters hiding in his room. He was further dismayed to learn that they had knocked nearly everything off the hangers in his closet, and had mixed up his card collection, moving cards around. So when Logan came looking for them a few minutes later, Josh gleefully turned them in.

Victor and Angelo found themselves under guard in front of Logan's office, as Logan first spoke to Julian over his pranks yesterday and earlier today. Julian had been disappointed to learn that he would not be expelled, and vowed to try harder next time.


	4. Crime and Punishment

Disclaimer : I don't own X-men Evolution, just Kaitlyn

**Chapter Four**

" Crime and Punishment"

Logan had gathered the pranksters in a meeting room, they were waiting for him to return, and glaring at each other, because Julian was mad that they had scared him. The other two were mad at him for causing all of the trouble the day before. Julian still maintained, to himself, that the only one who had the right to be mad at him was Laura….. and possibly Logan, maybe.

Logan then stormed into the room, still irate over the pranks. He stood before the boys, glaring.

" Pranking is completely unacceptable. I have, until now over looked many pranks, as they were harmless, however as of now pranks are going into the Book." Logan began. " Victor, Angelo. What you did was cruel and potentially dangerous… so I will ask once, were you involved in any of yesterday's pranks?"

" No,sir." Both boys intoned.

" Fine, wait for me outside."

As soon as they left, Logan turned to Julian. " Were you the one who messed with the shampoo? Answer me honestly, I can smell a lie a mile away."

" No,sir."

" Are you sure? You have a five minute window here. I want a full confession of all pranks you have pulled, no punishment."

" I planted the fake test, which was never meant to be seen by everyone. I Opened the gates, and let the Salesmen in. I also am the one who switched the salt and sugar, and the tabasco and ketchup… But not the hair…or the orange juice." Julian replied.

"Okay then, you are grounded for the next month, as I said earlier, and wait, what happened to the orange juice?"

" Someone put what tasted like peppers into it."

" Okay. On your way out, send Victor in."

Julian nodded, relieved that he didn't get into further trouble, because if they weren't expelling him, he certainly didn't want the punishments. He quickly passed the message to Victor, snidely telling Angelo to wait his turn when he stood as well, and walked away.

Victor, meanwhile , walked nervously back into the room.

" Have a seat Victor." Logan began. The boy sat nervously on the edge of his seat.

" Now. I want the truth. Who messed with the shampoo and orange juice?" Logan asked.

" Idonno."

" Do you really expect me to believe that?" Logan said glaring at the boy.

It took a few minutes, but Victor broke, as everyone always does. " Okay fine! I messed up the orange juice, I was trying to get back at Julian, it's also why I switched the toilet paper to the bad emergency paper, and put glue in his hairbrush. But I didn't do the shampoo, or the Bulletin boards."

" You will switch the paper back right away. You will also clear out his brush for him and, what happened to the bulletin boards?"

" Someone drew on them, sir. On every single paper."

"….how good were the drawings?"

" Fairly good, sir. Especially the one of you with skunk hair, and stink lines."

" WHAT?!"

" I donno who done it though."

" Send Angelo in on your way out. Four weeks, no town or TV."

Victor rushed from the room, relieved that Logan hadn't killed him, and sent Angelo in as he ran by.

Angelo walked into the room carefully. He was unsure what to expect from the angry Headmaster. Who appeared frighteningly calm.

" I want to know right now." Logan began as the boy sat down. " Were you the one who did the shampoo and bulletin boards?"

"… I have no idea , what happened to the bulletin boards?" Angelo replied.

" Someone drew on em."

" Nope, not me." Angelo replied.

" What did you do to them."

" I may have loosened a few screws on one, so that it would fall when someone touched it. "

" Okay, what other pranks have you done. And know this, any I find out about after the fact, the punishment will be doubled."

" Well…" Angelo began. " I painted 34 garden gnomes into grey suits, and hid them all over Mr Wilson's office and bedroom, I painted a welcome sign onto the front wall, I may have been the one that ordered the pizza party, but I only ordered 15 pizzas, so they either added twenty, or someone else had the same idea, I painted the racing strips on the Blackbird, I convinced Jamie that werewolves were in the woods and out to get him, I slipped pepper into the orange juice, I put Tabasco sauce in the coffee this morning, I switched out the laundry soap for dish soap, I put purple dye into Rahne's shampoo bottle; itching powder into Laura's; blue dye into Illyana's; Nair into Dr. McCoy's; perfume into Mrs LeBeau's and someone stole my idea because I did not do yours, or add peroxide to Dr. McCoy's that would have been overkill. I switched the covers on half the books in the library. I told Mrs. Allerdyce that her father was on the phone when it was actually a salesman, twice. I called Mr. LeBeau's father, and invited him to visit next weekend. ( Which one) Both. I sent for a mail order bride with your credit card and name. She should be here next Thursday. I –"

" That's enough. Write out a complete list and have it to me by this evening. Oh, and as of right now, you are grounded from all privileges."

" For how long."

" I'll let you know when you have them back."

" Okay, sir."

Angelo then calmly walked out of the room, as the teachers walked in, seeing them, Angelo turned back to add. " Oh, I also am the one that dumped rock salt on the carnations on the west lawn."

Angelo wisely ran before Storm could react. He wouldn't have confessed to that last one, if not for the fact that she, along with most of the staff were leaving this afternoon.

~o~O~o~

In the end, thanks to his confessions, Logan decided Angelo had been the perpetrator of yesterday's hair pranks. Julian was therefore let off the hook for that one. However, Logan was still angry over the Salesmen and Test.

The only relief he felt, honestly, was that Julian had said he had never intended for it to be passed around. Knowing, as he did, that Julian is an idiot, Logan then assumed that the prank was solely against Laura and Paige. Therefore the only thing Logan still held against the boy was the salesmen. Thanks to Julian omitting the part where he called them, and the welcome sign confession, Logan decided it wasn't entirely the boy's fault.

He is, after all, an idiot. Therefore, Logan decided that everyone, himself included, should be punished for this oversight. After all, they had left the boy to his own devices, that never ended well. So, Logan cancelled the cable. That would punish them all, and he wouldn't have to transfer it to their new home. Which he thought of after calling, and decided was just a bonus. Especially as the operator had offered to let him upgrade instead, with fourteen shopping channels. FOURTEEN.

After the meeting, and everyone who was leaving had left, Logan decided what they really needed was another group meeting. This time with the kids.

He was on his way to announce it, when Jamie ran up to him, and breathlessly handed him five spiral bound notebooks. " Here, Angelo said to hand these to you, and tell you that he'll be finished as soon as he 's done with his last notebook."

Sighing, Logan opened the first one. It appeared that Angelo had decided to confess to every prank he had ever pulled since grade school. After all, one would assume that it was a grade school prank to add blue kool-aide to the pool filter, and then scream that someone had peed. On the other hand, Logan vaguely remembered that happening last month.


	5. Into the Night

Disclaimer: I still don't own X-men Evolution

**Chapter Five**

"Into the Night"

John and Wanda were patrolling the halls. He had been rambling in a way that was giving Wanda a headache. It was their turn to perform bed checks, and they wanted to finish quickly, so that they could go to sleep, especially Wanda who was feeling extra moody. This, however, seemed a doomed plan as they walked down the girls' hall, to hear Illyana yelling about something in Russian. They sighed as they went to see what was wrong. Apparently the girl had decided that the entire house was against her in the whole 'Julian' thing. So she was throwing a fit as she (finally) packed for the move.

"Are you alright?"

" No. I am not alright! I have to pack,I hate packing, **and** I had to clean the shower room. Plus Julian isn't in any trouble at all for **attacking me. You people are all crazy and I hate it here.** I wish Magneto had kept me captive forever! Being locked in a damp dungeon was better than this school!"

"Okay then. Get to bed before too much longer, we have a long day tomorrow"

As they left the still steaming, and ranting girl's room, John continued his previous line of thought.

"I'm just saying, it's proof. I am Remy's my brother, which means that Sinister is my father, and since I am Remy's brother it also means I am a thief, and that also means Kurt is my brother-in-law which means I can probably get him to teach me how to Teleport." John rambled.

"I've tried to explain this to you a thousand times and I'm tired of hearing about this, IT'S KURT'S MUTATION HE WAS BORN WITH IT! IT'S NOT A SKILL THAT CAN BE TAUGHT! I AM TIRED OF YOU AND YOUR INSANE THEORIES! YOU'RE AS CRAZY AS MY BROTHER!"

"Which reminds me do you think you can ask you brother to teach me how to run really fast?"

"UGH! Shut up! It's late, I'm tired, and I'm pregnant, If you don't keep quiet for five minutes I'm going to cut you into thousands of pieces and leave you for the trash men."

John paused for a moment to stare at his wife, calculating her response.

"But if you killed me, you'd have to clean me up, and I think murder isn't in the b-"

"Saint John Allerdyce if you do not shut up right now you will be sleeping on the coach for the next three months."

Once again there was silence and then he said. "I can't keep quite that long." She stared for a moment then she slapped him. They walked away, Wanda mumbling about murder plans, to return to their room.

~O~

Remy and Rogue had put their children to bed, and then decided that since they had already packed, they should play cards for a while. After all, Remy always had cards. Rogue, however, was hesitant to play poker with her husband. He didn't know why, it wasn't like he was extraordinarily good at poker or something, oh no wait. Now he understood. So, in the end, they played Slap Jack. Which as it turned out, was a mistake for Rogue as well.

So now they were sitting quietly, trying to think of something else to do, while Rogue nursed a sore hand. Remy was doing his best to suppress a smirk. Rogue would _**not**_ appreciate his 'gloating'. It wasn't his fault that he had ridiculously fast reflexes, and excellent eyesight, and remembered exactly where every card in the deck was….okay maybe that last one really did count as cheating, but he couldn't help it really. Okay, so maybe he could, but she didn't know that. Regardless, if he didn't want to spend the night on the loveseat, or locked out of the room, he had to suppress the smirk.

In the end, Remy decided really the only thing, that may possibly not end in his early demise, was going to bed after all.

~O~

Emma and Wade had settled Megan in for the night, and were now bored. The cable was gone, and it was too early for bed. So they did the smart thing, and strolled the grounds, returning just before dark, they discovered that they had been invaded again. Wade hated the stupid things, which he insisted were, in fact, corporate elves in disguise, despite his wife's claim that they were decorations. He quickly destroyed them all, while Emma stood back and watched.

"You probably shouldn't have done that…"

"THEY ARE EVIL! THEY ARE CORRUPT AND EVIL! THEY ARE LIKE LAWYERS; ONCE THEY HEAR YOU HAVE MONEY THEY WILL TRY TO STEAL IT ALL FROM YOU! THEY CAN SMELL MY TACOS A MILE AWAY! THEY ARE ADDICTED TO EATING SOAP! THEY ARE EVILISH MONSTERS THAT ARE EVIL! EVIL I SAY! I'LL I HAVE TO SAY IS THAT THEY ARE 100% EVIL; they are also kind of cute. THAT IS A TRICK TO BRAINWASH YOU SO THEY CAN STEAL WHAT'S MOST IMPORTANT TO YOU IN THE WORLD! I HATE CORPORATE ELVES, NINJAS, SALESMEN AND BIGFOOT! OH HOW I HATE BIGFOOT,YOU CAN'T TRUST SOMETHING THAT MAKES THE WHOLE WORLD THINK IT'S A MYTH; JUST LIKE CHUPACABRAS! CHUPACABRAS AND BIGFOOT ARE IN LEAGUE WITH THE CORPORATE ELVES! OUR ONLY LINE OF DEFFENCE IS THE POCKET DRAGONS! BUT YOU CAN'T REALLY TRUST THEM EITHER, BECAUSE THEY ARE ALWAYS RELEASING THE LEGO BLOCKS;SO THAT PARENTS WILL STEP ON THEM IF THEY DON'T GIVE THEM PEANUT BUTTER SANDWICHES! ANYWAYS YOU SHOULDN'T BELIEVE A WORD FROM THE CORPORATE ELVES THEY ARE TRICKY, JUST LIKE SALESMEN!"

"Yes but I'm pretty sure those were painted garden gnomes." Emma stated. " I'll go talk to Logan about it."

~o~ A Few Hours Later~o~

Charles rolled into Logan's office, as Logan was about to go to bed for the night; "tea" on his breath and singing to himself.

" promised you wouldn't do this to yourself anymore!" Logan stated.

"Wha?"

"You promised you were going to stay sober.I can't watch you drink yourself to death like this. You need help Charles, because I can't continue to watch you kill yourself."

"Bu"

"No Charles. You need AA. I'll go with you to all the meetin's,and I'll make sure no one messes with ya about it, but you need to get help."

"You'd do that."

"Of course I would,I'm here for ya, Chuck."

Charles breaks down as he sobs "T-that's all I ever wanted! Someone to be there for me! I promise,I'll start AA as soon as we move"

"It's okay Charles, I'll be with ya every step of the way. According to the charts, acceptance is the biggest step." Logan says as the men hug.

Julian, who had watched the entire exchange from the doorway, cleared his throat.

"UM, sirs. I'm sorry to interrupt you bu"

"What are you doing up? It's 1 am" Logan demanded.

"Yes, but when I went to my room, to go to bed. It was destroyed. It looked like someone to a match to it. Luckily I had already put four boxes on the lawn, and they appear unharmed." Julian responded.

"It's 1 am and you were just now getting to your room?"

"Yes, no wait, I went in there a while ago, but took a nap before I came down to tell you. The only reason I'm bringing it up is that my clothing was still in there. Except for three spare shirts. Normally I would mention it to Mr. LeBeau, but knocking on his door in the middle of the night is dangerous unless it's an emergency."

"That's true, wait, you have four boxes on the lawn and hadn't packed your clothing. What did you pack?"

"Well I wrapped my gnome collection, which seems to be about half missing, I don't know how,I haven't moved them, in newspaper. But then I ran out, so I wrapped my sword collection in three old shirts. Then I moved that to the lawn, and went back to get the boxes that had my clothes, and the room burnt up. So I took a nap, then came to tell you. Have you seen my gnomes?"

"Umm, actually Julian… They ended up in Mr. Wilson's office and rooms.."

"So they're in lost and found? Who moved them like that. I hope they weren't scratched or anything."

"Actually….. we will have a very lovely funeral for them in the morning."

"…NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Logan and Wade stood awkwardly, as they watched Julian go through the bag of his gnome collection, tearfully.

" Look kid, if I'd known they were your gnomes, instead of the evil elves-" Wade began.

" If you were so obsessed with these make-believe elves my babies would not be in pieces!"

"Now kid I know you're upset, so I'll let that slide but"

" NO! YOU ARE ALL CRAZY AROUND HERE! MY ROOM WAS DESTROYED,MOST LIKELY BY THAT CRAZY GIRL WHO BROKE MY NOSE, SOMEONE PUT MY PRECIOUS GNOMES IN YOUR ROOMS AND YOU **_DESTROYED_** THEM! LAURA ISN'T SPEAKING TO ME. LOGAN THINKS I'M AN IDIOT. HELL YOU ALL DO, BUT AT LEAST I'M NOT CRAZY YOU USELESS SUPPOSED MERCENARY! GO CHOKE ON A DAMN TACO! No, not Susan too!" Julian stated as he shifted through the bag.

Logan and Wade decided it may be best to leave the boy for now, to allow him time to calm down and then they would remind of this, and he would apologize. Then Wade would again apologize. Then everything would return to normal, and they could forget this ever happened…. Except for they needed to go talk to that girl about burning other people's things.

~O~

Wade and Logan stared blankly, first at the empty room, then the note in Logan's hand. Apparently Piotr and Kitty had left, sometime between when John and Wanda had done the evening patrol at ten, and when Julian returned to his room at eleven. Why was the only thing they couldn't understand. After all, all they were trying to do was protect them all from the dangers of the outside world.


	6. The Gnome Funerals

Disclaimer: I do not own X-men Evolution

**Chapter Six**

"The Gnome Funerals"

Everyone in the house was up before the sun, woken by Wade, who had come up with the idea that all would be forgiven with a huge funeral. So he stayed up all night, preparing the elf, _umm_ gnome graves, setting up chairs, moving the piano into the lawn, and ordering a caterer.

Then, when everything was ready, he woke the house, by setting off the alarms. After all the would not be using them again anyway. After the panic had calmed, he announced that the funeral would begin in ten minutes.

Laura, having heard what happened, and no longer angry, went to speak with Julian. Jamie was the first to notice the absence of the Rasputins, though the first to mention it was John. Though that was only to note that it should be a lot quieter in the new house.

Logan was grouchy, having stayed up late researching AA meetings for Charles, and ordering moving vans online. The absence of several students as well as the Rasputins struck him first, though he was nowhere near as calm about it as John had been.

"What do you mean they are missing, how can no one have noticed them leaving?" Logan demanded, after a complete search of the grounds revealed that Victor, Josh, and Angelo were missing. Remy immediately searched their rooms, and returned to report that it appeared Josh and Victor had run away. Though Angelo's things were still in his room.

Logan growled at this turn of events , pacing back a forth for a few minutes before he demanded. " Alright! I've had enough of this. Anyone who is on the fence about continuing to be part of the X-men, needs to stand forward now. This is your last chance, anyone who changes their mind after this will be considered at traitor to the cause! Well, you have two minutes, make up your minds!"

Everyone stared, wide eyed at Logan, as Angelo reappeared on the lawn, Hope by his side.

"Umm. Sorry I was late everyone, Hope called and asked me to pick her up at the train station." Angelo stated.

"I talked my mom into changing her mind." Hope added.

" Okay then. Anyone else? No; good; then let's get on with this funeral, so we can get outta here before anything else can happen.

With that, the funeral began, everyone sitting quietly, as Charles first spoke of the loss Julian had endured, "Good morning, students, if you can call a morning good, in light of our gathering here. Today we are here, to pay our respects to young Julian's gnomes. They were very dear to him, and though many may not see the importance of Garden Gnomes, they were important to him. As such, he has felt a very profound loss, and therefore, we will be here to help him through these trying times."

Then Logan stood, to speak on the matter. "It is never easy to say good-bye to those you love. It is harder still when the loss is caused by the thoughtlessness of a friend. However, we must not dwell on things we cannot change, instead we must move forward, and remember, eventually, they will get what's coming to them…. When they least expect it; then you strike, and they never know what hit them. Then; then finally you can finally let it go that your best friend stole the last damn taco! I mean then, you will finally be at peace."

Julian tearfully began his speech, in the wake of Logan's, everyone still trying to figure out exactly what it was Logan had said. " I have been collecting Gnomes since I was five. I know many people don't understand them. I've even heard the words 'creepy' or 'weird' before. However, when I brought my collection here, to this school, I finally found acceptance for my hobby. My best friend loves them. My roommate thought they were interesting and my girlfriend, she always said they were cute. So finally I was comfortable with my hobby. Then, thanks to the thoughtlessness of another, my gnomes were destroyed. I admit, I was livid at first, but now realize that Logan is right. It's time to let go of the anger, because one day they will pay. With the loss of their beloved priceless Star Wars collectables still in their original packaging, in mint condition…and then all will be well in the universe."

All then seemed forgiven, at least for the moment. That was, until Wade began his speech. " I want to start by saying that I am very sorry for the emotional turmoil that I may have caused young Mister Keller in regards to his collection. It was never my intent to cause the boy, or any student here, any form of upheaval. However I must take a moment now, to speak on a matter of great importance. Corporate Elves. Corporate Evils are evil tricky creatures. They can disguise themselves as anything, as demonstrated by Julian's "gnome" collection! He may _**think**_ that he is simply collecting harmless garden gnomes, but in reality they are Corporate Elves in disguise! Now I personally have dealt with these elves over and over again, so clearly I can tell the difference. I would never intentionally harm a helpless gnome, however, those creatures, that were aided by students in this very school, invaded my office and rooms. I knew of course right away that they were not gnomes, but elves , here to steal all of the tacos and waffles, stir up the anger of the pocket dragons, release bigfoot and fairies into the school, invite salesmen to invade our borders and cause chaos. Because that is what they do! Yes, we have all heard this 'rumor' that Julian was the one that started the panic three days ago by hiding a pregnancy test and calling the salesmen; however, I maintain that this was not his fault! Clearly he was under the influence of these evil elves in disguise! Futhermore, I feel the only way to ensure our future safety is to have his remaining elves stay here in the garden. After all if they are truly garden gnomes as they claim then they would be far happier out here, and if I'm right, and I know I am, then we will be free of the ongoing Elf threat. The only other option is to release the pocket dragons into the school. Though I am not sure if we have enough peanut butter to keep the dragons happy, so it isn't a viable choice. I know that leaving them behind, may be difficult for Julian, therefore I am completely willing to overseeing their safe release myself."

Everyone stared confused for a few minutes as Wade sat back down, before Julian snapped.

"I've had all I can take of you, you insane wanna be mercenary! It is absolutely ridiculous that you are so obsessed with _**every freakin subject**_! First you obsess over your stupid freakin tacos, and swords, and then you jump right on board with this baby apocalypse theory, Logan's just as freakin bad about it, THERE IS NO BABY APOCOLYPSE! It just you both being melodramatic over a simple baby boom. There's nothing 'apocalyptic' about babies, come on we all started as babies to begin with. I'll give you that they are kind of freaky when they do things like start fires or throw up, but that doesn't mean they are ending the world, it the opposite actually, if you didn't have babies, we wouldn't still be here. AND ANOTHER THING! There's no Salesmen apocalypse either, it's just impulse control! You tell them _**no**_ and they go away; they only keep coming back because you buy from them. CORPORATE ELVES _**ARE A MYTH!**_ THEY WERE GARDEN GNOMES! THEY WERE JUST STATUES, NOT CREATURES TRYING TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD! And do you know what else?! The Book is _**not**_ the answer to everything! It's just the list of rules! I don't think either one of you really believe in the 'BA' the 'SMA' _**or**_ Corporate Elves! I think you are intentionally being overly dramatic in an attempt to control us and turn us into you mindless Zombie slaves just like the LeBeaus and the Allerdyces! HAS _**ANYONE**_ ACTUALLY READ THE BOOK?! IT WAS INTENTIONALLY DESIGNED SO THAT THE LeBEAUS, WADE, AND LOGAN _**CAN'T**_ GET INTO TROUBLE! HOW HAS NO ONE ELSE NOTICED THAT? You know what else? Wade shouldn't be allowed to teach sex ed, Jamie and Rahne spent _**months**_ convinced that they were pregnant because Rahne bumped into Jamie! Because Wade can't even explain where babies come from! Do you know who finally cleared it up? ME! Jonothon, Paige, Laura, and I sat them down and explained it! When we live at a _**school**_ that requires sex-ed as _**mandatory **_we had to_** explain **_it to fellow students_**!"**_

Chaos again descended by the end of Julian's speech. Logan was appalled that Julian had so blatantly denied the BA, SMA, and Corporate Elves… though to be fair, Logan didn't really believe in the elves either. Still that wasn't the point. Rogue was offended that anyone would claim that she was brainwashed. She was not brainwashed, she simply suddenly realized that Logan had been right all along….to listen to those annoying seminar people….CRAP she had been brainwashed! Remy's line of thought was similar to Rogue's except that he refused to admit to himself that he had been tricked into something that he formally didn't care about one way or the other. John and Wanda were just annoyed, Wanda because Julian's ranting had reminded her of her husband's tendency to rant, and John because Wanda was annoyed and also because he ,like Rogue, realized he had been brainwashed.

Wade however was really, _**really**_ concerned that Julian didn't take any of the threats seriously, especially the corporate elves, clearly they had gotten to the boy, filling his head with lies about them being melodramatic. After all, would Logan really be this freaked out over something that wasn't real? It wasn't like Logan was easily brainwashed or anything. Because the easily brainwashed tend to end up in bad situations, where people rip apart your life, destroy your memory, and use you…Wade saw several movies on the subject. True Logan had belonged to Weapon X…as had Wade…. Where they ripped apart their lives, destroyed their memories, and used them.

"OH MY GOD LOGAN! THE CRAZY STUPID ONE IS RIGHT! _**WE'VE BEEN BRAINWASHED!**_ IT'S POSSIBLE THERE REALLY ISN'T A BABY APOCALYPSE, _**WHAT IF THE CORPORATE ELVES CREATED THE RUMOR TO THROW US OFF!**_ THEY MUST BE IN LEAGUE WITH THE SALESMEN! WE NEED TO ACT NOW BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE, THEY ALREADY GOT TO NINJA-SLAYERS PARENTS AND THE FIRE-BUG! WHAT WILL WE DO IF THEY GET TO US ALL! QUICK! THROW OUT THE CHARTS, IT'S HOW THEY'RE CONTROLLING US!" Wade stated as he removed a sword from Julian's box, and destroyed his countdown clock, and then burnt his own clipboard.

A moment later, Logan follow suit, destroying his charts and then pulling out his copy of the Book, ripping out the parts in the center, as he began to freak out. Sure the rules were still valid, at least most of them, but the BA testimonials and projections were just a diversion, clearly created by the true enemy, the Salesmen!

Everyone else then destroyed their own books, following Logan's lead, and Charles began wondering if the Salesmen were the source of his drinking problem, after all he could order all of his 'tea' from a catalog in his bottom drawer. Julian just shook his head. Clearly everything he had said had gone straight over their heads. Slowly order was restored, when a telemarketer called Logan's cell phone, reminding the adults that they needed to get out of here before the Salesmen returned.


	7. Moving Vans and Emergency Meetings

Disclaimer:I do not own X-men Evolution or Google or Wal-Mart

**Chapter Seven**

"Moving Vans and Emergency Meetings"

After everything had calmed back down, and they had sent Remy and John to pick up the vans, another crisis struck; this time thanks to a belated Google search. Rogue discovered, by accident, that Snow Valley was virtually unheard of; it was known only for its extremely large Vacuum Salesmen training center.

"Logan!" Rogue yelled breathless as she ran up to the leader. "I just discovered the worst possible news! Snow Valley has already fallen under the Salesmen Plague!" She then showed him the article she had found on Google.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Logan screamed, staring at the screen of her smartphone. "THIS ISN'T POSSIBLE! THEY HAVE FOUND ENOUGH HOLD THAT THEY ARE COMPLETELY TAKING OVER OUTLYING AREAS! THERE IS NO HOPE WE ARE DOOMED!" With that, Logan threw Rogue's phone onto the ground, smashing it under his boots, in case they could somehow trace his location with the phone.

After all everyone (Logan) knew that vacuum salesmen were the worst of their kind. They could talk you into buying a new vacuum when you already had _**thirteen.**_ Logan knew, it had happened to him….six freakin times.

Rogue calmly joined Logan in the destruction of the phone; she herself had been drawn into the vacuum trap. When she was just twelve, they had shown up for a demonstration….she had talked Destiny into buying two, and _**they had hardwood floors!**_ Worse, the vacuums in question were _**not**_ the multi floor type! Clearly they were they trickiest of all the Salesmen…. Unless you counted in those knife guys, but Rogue refused to think about those ones again.

Wanda, who was always game for phone destruction then joined them as well, stomping until there was nothing left. It was then that Laura brought up a good point.

"Why bother destroying the tracking device, if we are moving into the center of the invasion?"

"WE ARE! " Logan yelled, realizing his daughter was right. "THAT'S IT! EVERYTHING BACK INSIDE! CHARLES, WADE, WE NEED TO TALK!"

With that everyone went back to work, while the leaders went inside to discuss a new plan. Charles went directly to his desk, and removed his last bottle of Scotch. Logan, normally, would have been upset by this, as Charles had sworn he had dumped it all this morning. However, he instead poured himself a glass as well. After all, it may have been in the book, but he now realized that the book had, in fact, been written by the evil Salesmen, Corporate Elves, and possibly even Apocalypse himself!; therefore no longer important. Wade paced back and forth in front of the desk, worried himself about this invasion.

"This will never do, we have to do something about these Salesmen, but it may very well be too late, if they've even taken over as far as places no one has ever even heard of. What are we gonna do? There is clearly nowhere to hide from this, and it's too late to hide our location here. We can't live next to vacuum salesmen; we'd buy a new vacuum every day. On second thought we may want to think about getting a new vacuum. The old seems to have broken after someone attempted to suck up a large amount of orange juice. Apparently vacuums are hypersensitive when it comes to liquids… then again it may just need to be aired out. We should find out later, and in the meantime we should order a new vacuum as well as upping security around here. THAT'S IT I KNOW! WE NEED TO BUY A NEW VACUUM; THE POOR THING WAS RUINED BY ORANGE JUICE! "Wade stated rapidly.

The others nod in agreement as they begin to calm slightly, before the last part sank in, and Logan pulled out the water bottle. "No! Bad Wade! No salesmen. If we need a new vacuum we can get one from Wal-Mart. Their salesmen are safe, they never try to sell you anything at Wal-Mart; instead they let you wander into their maze until you are hopelessly lost. "

John and Remy returned with the vans a few minutes later, to discover that there were no longer any boxes waiting on the lawn. They went inside very confused, to discover everything had been unpacked and returned to its original positions. Logan and Wade, having had come up with a new plan to avoid the salesmen. It was, in their opinion, their most brilliant plan yet! If only they had thought of it sooner. They weren't going anywhere at all, but _**everyone**_ would think they had, because Emma and Charles, working together, used their powers to make the school appear destroyed and abandoned to anyone who didn't live there. It would keep away Salesmen and unwanted relatives, therefore the greatest plan!

After they had explained it to the others, the others had all quickly agreed. Remy, Rogue and Wanda were particularly happy with this plan, thanks to the idea of not having to deal with Mystique and Magneto again made them very happy. Remy nearly wept with joy at the idea that neither father would be able to locate him. Now everybody was in agreement to the new, better plan, they went about resettling the children into the house. The few remaining teens realized something wonderful that had occurred in the last few days as well… they all had their _**own**_ room now! They didn't have to share anymore. Which they thought was great.

The adults had a similar reaction when they realized that they no longer needed to wait for the apartments (that were really feeling like they would never be done) instead they could easily expand their suits into the empty ones around themselves, by adding a few doorways. Wade volunteered to begin right away… and for some reason everyone told him 'no'.

Logan then took charge of this expansion plan , enlisting Remy and John to help. By the end of the day, the Wilsons, the LeBeaus, and the Allerdyses would each have a sitting room, a large bedroom, two small bedrooms, and where the second bath had been, a large closet. They were all overjoyed to hear this.

Meanwhile, Emma, Rogue, and Wanda decided that since they weren't moving, classes should be held this afternoon. The kids were less than pleased to hear this, however, they had half expected something like that would happen to them. That didn't stop Julian from planning his latest 'revenge rambling' for the classes.


	8. What Happened?

Disclaimer: I do not own X-men Evolution

Chapter Eight

"**What Happened?"**

Mystique whistled happily as she drove over to the school. She had just returned from a shopping trip in the city, and had spent a bulk of her shopping spree in the toy stores, as well as hitting several places that specialized in cranky pregnant daughters who didn't appreciate their mother's attempts to apologize for one _**Tiny**_ misunderstanding… okay it was more like a dozen, but still, clearly the hormones were getting to Rogue.

She pulled through the gates, and slammed on her brakes. Right before her, where the school had stood just a couple of days ago was rubble. Clearly something horrible had happened! But why hadn't Erik said anything when she called him earlier?

_Maybe the girls are there and he didn't want to ruin the surprise!_ Mystique decided as she drove home, ready to see her daughters and spoil her grandchildren. She smiled happily, relieved that something had finally made them come home.

She pulled up, and happily began unloading the car as Erik, and surprisingly, Nathan came out to help.

"When did you decide to be friends?" She asked, while they unloaded.

"We are united against an even worse enemy!" Erik stated.

"Yes, apparently Jean-Luc has somehow gotten to my son. They plan to spend next weekend with him in New Orleans! We've been busy planning a counter strike since you left." Nathan added.

"But." She began "Aren't the girls' here now?"

"No. Why would they be?" Erik asked.

"Because, the mansion is gone, turned to rubble. I just assumed…"

"WHAT?!" The men yelled, dropping the bags, they ran to the surveillance room.

"When was the last time you checked the feed?" Mystique questioned.

"Umm…yesterday. We saw a bunch of them leaving, but most of ours were still there so we didn't worry about it." Erik said.

"Then Jean-luc posted on his Facebook that Anna and Remy were coming to visit him, so we began planning. We forgot to look again." Nathan stated.

"Well that's just great! Now how are we going to find out what happened." Mystique grumbled, "Why did you friend him anyway?" Both men just shrugged.

She was growing concerned. After all, if the girls were alright, clearly they would have come home… Unless Logan's stupid "You're bad parents' speech had _**gotten to them!**_

That's it! That must be why they weren't here, Logan had clearly brainwashed them somehow! Darn it, if only she had thought of it first. Oh wait, she had… during the previously mentioned 'tiny misunderstanding'. Well she wouldn't just stand ideally by while Logan brainwashed her girls! He was probably after her boys too, she needed to contact Kurt, Pietro, and Graydon before Logan had the chance, and get them to come home.

While she was thinking about all of this, Erik pulled up the feed, and fast-forwarded to where he had stopped watching yesterday. They all sat silently watching, Mystique making notes of what to change here in the warehouse, as boxes were packed and piled in the front hall.

"They must've been planning to paint or something like that, I think Raven." Erik stated.

Nathan jumped and looked around before asking "Who's Raven? I didn't know you had anyone else here."

"I'm Raven. I rarely use it." Mystique stated. "Perhaps, we have no way of knowing what they were up too; no doubt they were doing something Logan ordered. Brainwasher."

"Wait! I just saw Lorna leave."

"Yes they almost all did."

"No what I mean, is that I can call Lorna's mother to find out what happened."

Erik dialed the number, completely ignoring his wife's glare when she realized that he still had his ex on speed dial. After a few rings, his former wife answered the phone.

"Hello."

"Hello Erik." She responds with a sigh.

"I just realized that Lorna was withdrawn from school. Do you mind telling me why?" Erik replied.

"SO NOW YOU TAKE INTEREST. WHERE WAS YOUR CONCERN WHEN YOUR CHILD SUPPORT WAS DUE…? EVERY MONTH FOR THE LAST FOUR YEARS?! OR WHEN SHE WANTED YOU TO COME TO HER PLAY?! OR THE COUNTLESS OTHER TIMES SHE NEEDED YOU?!" with that his ex hung up, and it was several minutes later before Erik realized that she's never actually answered him. Fear the health of his eardrums, he decided against calling back.

"So? What did she say?" Mystique questioned snidely.

"Umm… Actually she didn't say."

"Great, that's just great. What did she say?"

"Nothing important, something about child support, don't worry about it."

Mystique shrugged, while making a note to call Lorna later. Lorna's room was all set up here as well, right next to Wanda's and Rogue's and across the hall from Pietro's and Kurt's. Mystique, however, hadn't had a chance to officially invite her to stay with them yet.

They watched for a few more minutes, as the people in the silent screen passed back and forth in front of the camera. The idea kept growing and growing inside Nathan, until he could no longer take it. Suddenly he stood.

"They're dead! All dead! I just _**know**_ it!" He yelled.

"No they aren't Nathan, calm down." Erik stated.

"Yes,yes they are! Think about it, if they are alive, where are they? They would have to be somewhere, and of course here is where that would be! SO clearly they must be dead! " Nathan stated.

"Oh my God! Erik he's right! Why else would they not come here when their house was destroyed? Clearly they are dead!" Mystique yelled, jumping to her feet as well.

"Now, dear please… you really must be calm, we have no proof that-" Just then he was interrupted by the feed cutting off, static replacing it " OH MY GOD THEY'RE DEAD!"

"THAT'S WHAT WE WERE TRYING TO TELL YOU! QUICK CALL THE BOYS, SEE IF THEY ARE STILL ALIVE!"

Magneto and Mystique both pull out their phones and dial the boys, Pietro and Graydon first, but neither son pick up. Then Mystique tries Kurt, while Magneto tries the other two again, with the same result.

" OH MY GOD, THE BOYS ARE DEAD TOO, WHY ELSE WOULD THEY NOT PICK UP?!" Magneto stated.

"Well to be fair, I would avoid your call too, but the evidence supports that they are indeed dead." Sinister replied.

" We need to call Victor and Jean-Luc." Mystique stated.

"Why?" Erik and Nathan asked.

"They were their sons too." Mystique responds tearfully.

"Your right." Erik replied, as Mystique nodded. Nathan pulled out his phone, to call Jean-Luc first.

"Hello?" Jean-Luc answered.

"JL… this is Nathan. Remy's other, realer father." Nathan replied.

"What do you want?" Jean-Luc responded with a sigh.

"JL… They're dead. They are all dead! Remy, Anna, the babies, their brothers and sisters. That evil man who stole them from us…all gone!"

"WHAT?! Who?! Who did this, they must pay! Tell me who!" Jean-Luc responded.

"W-we don't know yet." Nathan replied.

"…I'll be there in four hours! Don't plan the funeral without me." Jean-Luc replied then hung up.

Next Mystique called Victor (ignoring, like Erik had, the look her husband gave her).

"Lo?" Victor answered.

"Vic. Are you sitting down?" Mystique said.

"No." He replied with a sigh.

"You need to."

"Why?"

"I have terrible news."

"So tell me."

"Are you sitting now?"

"Yes."

"Vic, Graydon, Anna, Kurt, Pietro, Wanda, and everyone else are dead." Mystique replied. There was a loud crashing as Victor, who had not been sitting, fell over.

"WHO KILLED MY SON?! I WILL RIP THEM APART! I WILL MAKE THEM PAY! I WILL MAKE THEM WISH THEY ARE DEAD, THEN GRANT THEIR WISH! I'M GOING TO-"

"We don't know yet." Mystique replied.

"I'll be there in about two hours, don't do nothing without me." Victor stated before he hung up.


	9. Revenge and Funeral Plans

Disclaimer: I do not own X-men Evolution

Chapter Nine

"**Revenge and Funeral Plans"**

They all arrived quickly enough, and Eric led them into his office. Nathaniel had stated that he would join them soon, and left a few minutes before, mumbling something about 'chips', 'clothing', and …'Debbie?' but Erik and Raven ignored this as they were too wrapped up in the planning of the funerals, and the revenge. Oh the revenge would be glorious! Whoever had done this would wish they could invent a time travel device, to go back and undo what had been done, then if said person actually COULD build such a device they may allow them too, however after that they would pay!

Everyone else shared their feelings on the subject, though some wondered why the assassins arrived, BellaDonna and Julien in particular. Bella Donna, after all, had never been quiet in her opinion of Rogue, or the LeBeaus' marriage. Her brother had never been quiet over his hatred of all Thieves. None thought to question this however, because they soon fell into chaos as they never really get along well when gathered together. It was just an unfortunate side effect of simply hating each other.

It began, innocently enough, with Jean-Luc demanding " Marius! Just tell us who hired you t' kill my son and we'll let you alone."

"I told you already, Jean-Luc, I didn't do it! Maybe it was the insane Mercenary they let live with them?" Marius replied.

"Why would he do that unless you paid him to?" Jean-Luc snarled. This fight was a continuation of the one that began on the plane up to New York, and their people were all nodding and glaring behind them.

Marius had finally had enough of the accusations! Seriously, when had he ever taken money to kill a Thief? He did it all on his own, when he did. Foolishly he chose to voice this fact. The office filled with loud bangs as everyone began ranting, pacing, biting, fighting and worse of all _spiting _all over the place. Magneto watched in horror as all of the men assembled flipped out (and was destroying his office, but mostly the first thing, mostly) he couldn't bear it, he started to fear soon they would take their anger and grief out on him when suddenly they all heard a growl.

Victor stood, glaring at the men who were fighting. Now they all stood (and sat) quietly as they waited to see what was going to happen next.

"How can you act like this! At this point in time!? Look at how depressed Magneto is! (everyone looked over at Magneto and agreed, starting to feel guilty, but in truth Magneto was just terrified they were going to kill him.) Oh I'm sorry. I should use you name, Erik. I know not all of us our here! Look, where is Nathan? It may seem like we should start without him, but that wouldn't be right! We just lost our families, but so has he. I wouldn't be surprised if he was out looking for the person, or people responsible for this! I can't believe you could be so selfish and not even worry or think about how horribly painful this is for us all! ALL! We need not to fight, but to join together and come up with a way to defeat them get revenge!" Victor ended, and the was peace for a moment, until Bella-Dawn's father started to rant.

"You dirty Thief! If your son hadn't been screwing that, that mutant then none of this would-"

"How dare you Father! You should be ashamed, maybe if you hadn't threatened him on our first date!" Bella-Dawn snapped.

"What did you just say!?" He screamed.

"Maybe I should get going, I mean, you know so I can find out where they are, the killers you know."

Magneto said, trying to sneak off.

"BUT WE DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO THEY ARE!" Jean-Luc responded.

"…I'll think of something." Magneto said, still trying to get away.

"Hey it's interesting isn't it? He brings us here, claiming they have died, and suddenly he's going to leave us here as his back up, but we aren't allowed any weapons? And one of his most trusted men makes a long speech, trying to guilt trip? Well I don't buy it! I think we were set up, you know? I mean think about it! Look, if you don't have anything to hide then make your men get rid of their weapons? Unless that isn't okay, unless YOU ARE A LIAR who has decided that it's been too long since all of these new grandfathers and old grandfathers showed up. Nice how these things work. So here's my theory, he decided he wanted to be the BEST grandfather, so he decided he would invite us all here and get rid of us and our families! WHY'D YOU DO IT ERIK!? ." Jean-Luc finished, all of his family behind him, looking as though they were planning Erik's demise.

"Now, now, men do as this-this Jean-Luc says, it's funny isn't though? You come up with such a ridiculous theory, but wasn't it YOU and your little buddies who specialize in little, let's say, _games _you know where people disappear, get lost, you know found in pieces, funny isn't it?" Erik snarled.

"You're saying I KILLED MY OWN SON!" Jean-Luc said, beginning to get furious.

"Ayah! You admitted it! You killed your son, you family probably doesn't even know it, after all you wanted him to marry that Mindy-Dawn or Hannah or whatever her name is! You probably got pissed, I doubt her father even knows, you know that girl he was supposed to marry, yeah. I understand now, you killed him, probably planned on blaming me, and killing me. Making sure you get away with it." Erik replied.

"Now, that's not even believe-"

"OH MY GOD! HOW COULD YOU FATHER (everyone else began turning on Jean-Luc as well, even Tante Mattie.)" Henri exclaimed.

"Do you really believe-" Jean-Luc began but was cut off by Mr. Sinister who looked as though he had a completely new wardrobe, as he was now wearing black.

"Is this the time? I know who did it-it wasn't Jean-Luc, I have thought long and hard about it. It could be none other than my ex." He explained.


	10. To Las Vegas!

Disclaimer:I do not own X-men Evolution

Chapter Ten

"**To Las Vegas!"**

"Is this the time? I know who did it-it wasn't Jean-Luc, I have thought long and hard about it. It could be none other than my ex." Nathaniel explained.

"You have an ex?" Erik asked.

"…It's a long-very long-story. Very long." Nathaniel replied.

"So you think your ex killed Remy and the others?" Jean-Luc asked.

"No. I don't think she killed them, she isn't THAT evil. No, I think she probably just kidnapped, to get back at me. Our breakup was a very nasty one. It's a very long story." Nathaniel said, wiping a tear from his eye.

"…You had a girlfriend?" Erik asked still in disbelieve.

"Yes! Is it that hard to believe Erik! I mean I'm still surprised anyone would even kiss you, much less lay in the same bed at you at night! How many wives have you had now? Four, five?" Nathaniel smirked.

"Two!" Erik yelled.

"Whatever, five, two they're all the same number." Nathaniel said, waving his hands.

"You are a piece of sh-" Erik was cut off.

"Hey now! It sounds believable I mean, c'mon people do these kind of thing all the time." Jean-Luc said, trying to stop both men.

"Yes." Everyone else said together, deciding Nathaniel was a genius.

"…So what was your girlfriend named?" Erik asked.

"Debbie. She's a redhead. Me and her, we could take the world on. But we began drifting apart-I mean I don't understand why she would be mad at me, she's the one that left, only with a five word note to…" Nathaniel said, now blowing his nose.

"What was the note?" Jean-Luc asked.

"I really hope you die." Nathaniel said, trying to control himself.

"Geez." Victor muttered.

"Maybe she just hates you, maybe she's only doing this out of hatred, how do you know she wants you back?" Erik replied.

"Did I ever say that Erik? Anyways I _know _she wants me back because three months after she left to begged we go out again, but my heart couldn't take any more heartache. I am only a man after all." Nathaniel replied, grinding his teeth.

"WHAT! You're a man! I thought you were a vampire!" Jean-Luc said in shock.

"Whatever, it doesn't matter. I can find out where she lives now on her Facebook page." Nathaniel said pulling out his phone.

"Oh so she still has you as a friend on Facebook." Erik said, smirking.

"…No I just watch her page at all times, making sure she isn't plotting my demise, she must have done something while I wasn't paying attention." Nathaniel said, never looking away from his phone.

"She's in Los Vegas."

"Okay. But hey I have something to ask. What's with the black?" Victor asked.

"I used to wear this, it seems appropriate for mourning. Anyway it doesn't matter, I think I like this look better…but I need to come up with a new name. Nathaniel sounds so-so Nathaniel. I think I'll go by Dr. E." Nathaniel said, smiling.

"Dr. E.?"

"Yes. Let's go, we have to get to the kids before Debbie does something to them." Nathaniel stated.

With that they all pile into the metal orbs Erik created and are off to Los Vegas to rescue the 'kids'.

~o~O~o~

Meanwhile, at Xaviers, life had returned to normal. Now that the salesmen, and in-laws, were no longer bothering them, the Squad sat down to reassess what they knew of the Book, and what parts, in hindsight, they really should have kept. This was rather difficult, because they felt they needed to go over every rule, to ensure it hadn't been planted by the Salesmen.

In the end, they posted the new rules, which were very similar to the old rules, although, they no longer repeated themselves. The teen then gathered around, to see what the adults had in store for them.

"Okay, wait." Hope began. " They destroyed the Book, completely flipped out, created an illusion to hide us, then recreated the Book with the same rules?"

"It appears so." Angelo replied, frowning at the lists.

"Why?" Hope questioned.

"Because." Julian stated from behind them. "They are insane."

"Says the boy who seems bent on getting Mr. Logan to kill him." Angelo replied.

"Na, he wouldn't kill me. It's against the rules, see." Julian stated pointing at a chart.

Just then Julian got a wonderful idea. Let it be known, that whenever Julian gets a wonderful idea, everyone around him should run. Unfortunately for those around him, this time, he didn't announce that he was thinking, Though Angelo was suspicious, thanks to Julian's expression.

Before anyone could ask, he had ran off upstairs; dragging a reluctant Jamie behind him. Angelo wasn't sure whether to be relieved or scared, so he went with hungry and headed toward the kitchen. Laura and Hope shrugged before following Angelo, and Rahne decided it may be best to get one of the teachers, after all, Julian's ideas tended to cause trouble.

Charles and Logan were in their now shared office, discussing the best place for Charles to attend AA. Wade was with them, mostly because Emma refused to allow him to hide a dagger under her pillow for Elf protection so he was pouting.

"I understand your reluctance to leave the safety of the grounds, but you need help." Logan stated, as Charles frowned.

"But, now that we know it was the Salesmen_"

"I'm afraid knowing isn't enough. " Logan replied, sympathetically. " Now I'm still willin ta go with ya, but you gotta go."

Charles nodded gratefully as Rahne burst in without knocking. "Julian's up to something, and he's dragging Jamie into it!" she said, breathless.

"Crap!" Logan growled. He and Wade headed out in search of the boys.

Julian dragged Jamie into Jamie's room, and shut the door. Jamie glared and huffed for a moment before he stated "Okay what are you up to now, and how dead will I be for knowing about it?"

"Aww, you're no fun. We ain't going to die at all, Because I have the most brilliant plan ever! Seriously, no one has ever thought of this one before! I'm sure of it, and the best part is it isn't really even a prank… okay it is, but only partly a prank and I'm sure that I can pull it off."

"What is it already?!"

"Laura and I are going to elope to Vegas! But I need you to come be a witness!"

"Wait, what?" Jamie said. " You're crazy, I don't know if we can even get away with it, have you even asked Laura yet, and of course I'll come."

"No, cause you said to run everything by you first from now on. I'm going to go ask her now, then we can borrow the jet and we'll be back before the teachers even know we were gone."

Julian then raced downstairs, missing Logan and Wade by seconds, and into the kitchen, where he found Laura with the other kids. Not bothering to ask her to step out of the room with him, he immediately fell to one knee and said. " Okay I didn't have time to prepare, but Laura, will you marry me so that we can be together forever and make your Dad completely insane? It's both the best plan ever and the perfect prank, it's like a plank or something?"

"Julian, that is brilliant. Of course I'll marry you." Laura replied, Julian happily kissed her.

Then he yelled to the others "C'mon we have to steal the jet, get to Vegas and back, and get married before any of the adults know we're up to something!"

They then rushed to the jet. Logan and Wade arriving in the hanger just as they took off.


	11. Rescue Missions

Disclaimer: I do not own X-men Evolution

Chapter Eleven

"**Rescue Missions"**

Thanks to the speed of the jet, the teens arrived in Vegas at nearly the same time as the orbs, the teachers were not far behind them, but had not yet arrived. Raven, Erik, Jean-Luc, Henri, the Assassins, Victor and 'Dr.E.' (as he would now only respond to) walked calmly up the Vegas strip as they searched for 'Debbie'.

Emil had remained behind at the warehouse with the rest of the Thieves, so that he could trace this 'Debbie', and then he relayed the location to Henri, who in turn gave the information to Erik. Henri and Jean-Luc were not currently speaking because Henri still blamed Jean-Luc for Remy's 'death' and Jean-Luc was still insulted.

They walked right past the Xavier's kids without really noticing them on their way up to Debbie's apartment. Nathaniel ( or Dr. E) hesitated for a few moments before he knocked on her door. Suddenly, the middle aged, blond woman yanked open the door as she glared at Nathaniel.

"What in the world are you doing here?" She demanded.

"Debbie… I know you must still be heartbroken, as I am, from our break up. But that is no reason to kidnap my son and his family."

"We've been over this! One, my name is Amanda, not Debbie! Two, we never dated, I worked for you! For two weeks. Fifteen years ago. And… Wait, what?! Why would I kidnap your son? "

"Revenge. We all know you did it Debbie, there's no point in denying it. Now if you would just let us in so that we could collect our children-"

"They. Aren't. Here."

"Then where did you hide them?" Raven demanded from behind Nathaniel, tired of the argument.

"Nowhere! Now if you'll excuse me, I'm late for work." Debbie/Amanda replied as she stepped out of the door and locked it behind her.

"Debbie…Debbie,DebbieDebbie, Debbie… I know you must still be very hurt over our break up, but you _**can't**_ just take someone's children…I know, I've done it, but it only ends badly for everyone." Nathaniel said, as Victor and Erik nodded behind him, having also learned this in group.

She rolled her eyes and walked past them, as the insane parents turned as one to follow . "I do _**not**_ have time for your insanity! I swear I've never even met your son! Seriously, can you get any creepier, plus you're violating the restraining order."

"Ha! Now I know you're lying! I saw a picture of you with my son on your Facebook wall a couple of years ago!" Nathaniel stated.

"Fine, who's your son again?" Debbie/Amanda said with a sigh.

"Remy LeBeau, though it should be Essex, also referred to as Gambit."

"Oh yes, I have met him, he used to come in and play the tables all the time, I haven't seen him in a couple of years though, do you know where he went?"

"He got married, had a couple of kids, then was kidnapped… by you!"

"I. did. Not!"

"Sure you didn't, also why was he playing the tables? He wasn't old enough to be playing here, don't you people check IDs, and GIVE ME BACK MY SON AND HIS FAMILY!"

Debbie/Amanda shook her head as she walked away, sure there was no reasoning with this man, after all, he had been bothering her for years.

~o~O~o~

Meanwhile, the kids were now sat on the stairs of the wedding chapel, apparently you can not elope if you are under eighteen without a parent or guardian's permission. So they were attempting to decide what to do next, there wasn't a lot of things they _**could**_ do on the 'Vegas' list Julian and Angelo had brought with them.

Laura and Julian's wedding was out; although now that she thought about it, she would prefer if her father was here for it anyway. Gambling apparently wasn't allowed either. Also, much to the amazement of both Julian and Jamie, Disney World was not in Vegas. So now they were bored, and trying to think of something cool to do before going home.

They figured (correctly) that by now the adult knew they were gone, and were most likely following them while planning some sort of horrible punishment. Therefore, they needed to make this whole thing 'worth it'.

As they sat there pouting (no one had told them yet that guys don't pout), they see the teachers' parents following some angry looking woman down the street, while she screamed at them to leave her alone. Bored, and curious, they shrugged as one, and stood to follow the adults in question, to see what they were up to.

~o~O~o~

" When we find them, I'm killin that boy." Logan growled as he piloted the Velocity.

"Non, you ain't. It's against the rules." Remy replied, from the co-pilot's seat.

"I'll change the rule when we get home!" Logan said, gripping the controls, causing them to swerve.

"HEY! If y'all can't fly straight, let someone else do it. You got pregnant people back here!" Rogue screamed, holding her stomach.

"Why did we bring everyone again?" Wade asked.

"To keep Logan from killing Julian." Wanda responded, as she checked on William, who was asleep next to her.

"Oh, yes now I remember." Wade nodded, as he pulled out a sword to sharpen.

"Wade! We don't have enough room in here for that." Emma complained.

Wade rolled his eyes, but put the sword away, as John made a noise that sounded suspiciously like a whip. Wanda then glared at her husband until he apologized.

Meanwhile, Kaitlyn was starting to get bored. She didn't really like travel, and her parents hadn't yet given her her morning snack (though it was in the diaper bag.), she began to whimper and everyone froze. A crying, fire-starting toddler on a helicopter flying at top speed over an uninhabited part of the desert somehow seemed like a bad idea.

Rolling her eyes at everyone's pale-faced expressions, Rogue pulled out her daughter's juice and crackers. "Seriously, y'all should be used to her by now." Rogue growls.

"Why, what's wrong?" Remy asked from up front.

"Kaitie's cranky and they all are freaked out." Rogue replied.

"Pansies" Logan grumbled. "Hold on we're over Vegas now."

Everyone sighed with relief as they smoothly landed, Logan jumping out of the door before the blades had come to a stop. He realized this may have been a rash move when half of his hair fell to the ground, leaving him lopsided and foolish looking. This was made obvious by the laughter of Remy, John and Wade. With a growl, Logan walked off in the direction of the Blackbird, to check for the wayward teens.

They weren't in the plane (obviously) so Logan led the search for the children, with the others trailing behind him slowly. The babies had fallen asleep and Kaitie was staring at all of the lights with interest. Remy carried the squirming toddler, and was doing his best to distract the child. He certainly didn't want her to begin gambling this young… maybe in five-six years, but not yet.


	12. There You Are!

Disclaimer: I don't own X-men Evolution

Chapter Twelve

"**There You Are!"**

Debbie/Amanda sighed when she realized that the insane followers were not going to leave her be, even when she went into the employee's lounge, they trailed right behind her, despite her manager's glare.

She turned to them once more and began " Look! I don't know where they are, now you need to leave before you get me fired, and how are there more of you now?"

The teens had slipped in behind them, and were attempting to be invisible, which they had largely failed at, except Laura. Confused, Raven turned, and spotted the teens. " HA! " She began. "Proof! These are their students! If you didn't have our kids, why would you have their students?"

"They followed _**you**_ in here!" Debbie/Amanda replied.

" Debbie…DebbieDebbieDebbieDebbie… We all know what you did, so why don't you just give it up and tell us where they are?" 'Mr. E' replied (Nathaniel/Sinister).

"I didn't take them!" Debbie/Amanda yelled once more.

"No one took us, we're just hiding from the Salesmen." Rahne stated. "It was the only way to keep from going broke, so they hid the school, and canceled the cable. So now we're bored and looking for Disney World."

"Disney World's in Florida, dear." Debbie/Amanda supplied.

The others just stared at the child. Then the teens all pulled out their phones to double-check this information. With yells of glee they ran from the room, any plan to find out what the villains were up to was forgotten in favor of the theme park.

"Wait, so they aren't dead or kidnapped, just hiding from Salesmen?" Erik questioned.

"That's what those kids said, though it doesn't explain why the boys didn't answer their phones." Raven replied.

"…Maybe they just hate you." Henri said, thinking of the number of times his brother had hung up on their father.

"Or they are having issues with their mutations that cause them to accidentally destroy their phones." Jean-Luc added, thinking of the same thing.

"Pere… It's not an accident." Henri stated.

"So you're trying to say your brother intentionally destroyed his phone fifty-nine times just to avoid me?" Jean-Luc replied.

"Yes."

"No. It was accidental." Jean-Luc replied, turning back to the others, who were nodding in agreement.

"Good. Now that you've established that I had nothing to do with it, will you get out before I get fired?!" Debbie/Amanda demanded.

Before they could respond, the X-men burst into the room. "Oh for the love of-" Debbie/Amanda stated, throwing her hands in the air and walking out of the room.

Her departure went unnoticed as the X-men spotted the Villains, but not the children. The women groaned when they realized that this meant dealing with their crazy parents, while Remy was torn between happiness at seeing his brother and a strong desire to blow up his phone at seeing his fathers.

"What are you doing here, and where are the kids?" Logan demanded.

"We're here to confront Debbie over kidnapping you and the children said something about Disney, I don't remember which one." Dr. E (Sinister) replied.

"Who, never mind, we weren't kidnapped, and now we need to find those kids." Logan replied.

"Debbie… my Ex. It's a very long story."

"I'm pretty sure she said her name was Amy or Allison, or something like that." Erik said.

"No. I'm pretty sure she said Clair or Sarah." Victor added.

"Elsie? Julie?" Raven supplied.

" It's Debbie. I would know, I used to date her."

"Do you have any idea what's going on?" John whispered to Wanda.

"They're all being crazy again." Wanda replied.

While they then debated the poor woman's name, the X–men attempted to slowly back out of the room. They had nearly succeeded in their escape when Kaitlyn spotted a bowl full of candies, and began pointing and crying.

As expected, a fire started behind the bowl. John quickly put it out, as Remy told the child no and Raven shook her head at them (she felt the child wasn't 'spoiled enough'). Sinister/Dr.E then stepped over to them.

" It's alright everyone, I have this watch. " He began. " Hello Kaitlyn , it's me your grandfather. " He added in his attempt at a baby voice.

This made the girl actually cry instead of just throwing a fit. It was at this point that Jean-Luc realized that Kaitlyn had actually caused the fire, and Rogue finally snapped.

"That's it! This has been the worst week ever. First we are attacked by the Salesmen, then we learn that we were all tricked into believing in the Baby Apocalypse when all we really had to worry about was making rules to avoid the kids acting like most of us did as kids, then we had to hide the mansion, the kids ran off, we ran into you people, Kaitlyn's cranky, and I am done! I'll meet you all in the Velocity." Rogue then stormed off with her husband right behind her.

"… Remember to buy chocolate on the way back." Logan mumbled to Wade who nodded briefly. They then turned back to the others and Jean-Luc was now glaring at Henri. Who was sure somehow knew that Kaitlyn could do that.

"How many of you knew she could do that and for how long?" He demanded.

"Do what?" Erik replied.

"That fire thing!" Jean-Luc replied.

"That wasn't her, it was John." Erik stated, while everyone else, including Henri nodded.

"No it wasn't."

Before anyone could respond Debbie/Amanda returned with security. They were all told to leave, and then filed out calmly. All in all it hadn't been a bad day, after all the kids were fine, they all were in Vegas, and the Salesmen hadn't found them.

So they all went their separate ways, the X–men off in search for the students, Raven and Erik went off to play the casino since they were already here. Victor just wandered off, Jean-Luc and Henri walked away still arguing over Kaitlyn, the Assassins went to book tickets home, and Mr. E/Sinister returned to Debbie/Amanda's apartment so they could continue their conversation after she returned from work. The previous excitement over the supposed 'deaths' was completely forgotten and everyone was calm again, at least for now.


End file.
